Main Event
Steel Cage Match
Pure Championship
Raging Dead vs Frank "Hanger" Lowe (c)
For some reason, Frank Lowe is already in the ring, drawing in boos from the crowd as he removes the Pure Championship belt from his waist.
"Rage 25/8" by Z Mann Zilla fills the earholes of the scum packed into the Nationwide Arena. Without any creepy lights or smoke, The Raging Dead storms out from backstage. He is huffing and puffing, still worked up over the nonsense that took place at Bad Moon Rising. The music dies down and he lifts up w microphone...
Raging Dead: Week one. Frank Lowe and I nearly killed each other. Week two. I would have destroyed Mute had Mute truly been Mute. Week three. I was the only one brave enough to show up to Bad Moon Rising. Week four… Frank Lowe gets murdered on live television. That's not meant to sound like I'm pretending to be a badass asskicker. I'm honestly going to end the life of a human being. Tonight inside that steel cage… I am going to beat him mercilessly until he can no longer be beaten. Then I am going to meticulously peel his skin from his face and wear it as my own on Halloween next Thursday.
He starts the journey down the ramp of destiny…
Raging Dead: Yes, mouthbreathers of Columbus. You are all about to be witnesses to a heinous and hideous crime. Frank Lowe does not deserve your admiration, nor does he deserve that Pure Championship. He forfeited his right to be champion when he failed to defeat me in my debut, and then again last week when he didn't bother going to Madison Square Garden to lose that championship to me like a man. Tonight, assuming he is here… he will get what's coming to him: slow and painful death.
He circles the ring, mean mugging everyone in the crowd...
Raging Dead: Do you want to know how I have spent the last week? I left New York City immediately after Cecilia Ortiz cancelled my rightful coronation as Pure Champion… and I started walking to this dumpster fire of a city. Over five hundred miles… just so I could be here tonight… to get inside of that steel cage… to decimate that abomination of a champion Frank Lowe. For me to spend all that time and energy to make it here tonight… I sure hope that worthless meat suit finds it in him to show up to fight me. Last week was bullshit enough. If that happens again, I'm going to walk to Detroit… show up in his neighborhood... fight everyone who has ever met him… then burn down his fucking house.
He walks up the steps and then falls between the ropes, now lying on the mat…
Raging Dead: I know this all seems a bit extreme. When I am fortunate enough to feel anything other than hunger… I feel those feelings exhuberantly. Right now… I feel like I should be Trinity Wrestling Pure Champion. The Raging Dead is just the kind of champion you people deserve… if only because I will never not show up to an arena and fight everyone. Frank Lowe is a bitch, and should have lost the title to me last week… but… because he's a bitch… he was probably too busy shooting up some BoJack and beating his silicone wife.
He gets to his feet and looks towards hard cam…
Raging Dead: Frank Lowe… you are the self-proclaimed embodiment of toxic masculinity. You are a ruff, rude, self-centered, nefarious scoundrel. I would like to add to that description by saying your a pansy ass cuck bitch… you have got a micropenis that is currently being judged by the Guinness Book of World Records… you are likely a relation of that filthy rapist Christopher Columbus… and you are absolutely going to lose the Pure Championship to me tonight.
He drops the mic and prepares to hopefully fight tonight by removing the turnbuckle pads in every corner...
Case: And here… we… go!
Raging Dead and Frank Lowe stare at each other inside the ring as the cage starts to lower slowly. Without hesitation, they charge at one another and engage in a hockey fight. Relentless fists are flying, and…
Trey: Raging Dead is already busted open! I can't tell if it's his left eye, or just above it. Either way, it's gross.
Raging Dead reacts to the blood by biting Lowe's shoulder and breaking the skin. Lowe reacts to the blood by bailing from the ring. Dead doesn't think and just charges, connecting with a suicide dive, sending both men crashing into the barricade.
Case: These two are crazy. The cage isn't even all the way down.
Dead gets to his feet and grabs ahold of Lowe's bleeding shoulder. Lowe instinctually low blows Dead and connects with a scoop powerslam on the mat outside the ring. He looks at the lowering cage and smiles, then rolls Dead into the ring, lining him up underneath the cage's projectory.
Case: No way. He wouldn't. Would he?
Trey: Yes, he absolutely would. The cage is now down on Raging Dead's chest. Ring crew is now out and trying to talk Frank Lowe out of this heinous act… but he's not letting up.
Case: Isn't anyone going to stop this? Frank Lowe could kill the guy!
Trey: As he's told us countless times… he's already dead...
As the steel cage pushes down on Dead's chest, security rushes out and attempts to stop Lowe. They are met with a fury of rights and lefts, knocking them down like bowling pins. Then, suddenly, the lights go out. We hear the eerie cackle of an elderly man. When the lights come back on, Raging Dead is standing in the middle of the ring!
Case: What in the hell is going on here?!
Frank Lowe looks bewildered, before entering through the cage door and charging at Raging Dead, connecting with a Aloysius Martin Thesz Press. He unleashes a fury of strikes that further bust Dead's wound open. Lowe looks spooked, and gets to his feet.
Trey: It looks like Frank Lowe is… uhm… scared?
Case: I don't blame him. He's looking down at a puddle of blood and… Raging Dead is… smiling?
Raging Dead sits up, his crooked smile peeking out from under the crimson mask. Lowe goes for a running boot, Dead ducks and rolls to his feet. He catches Lowe with a rear waste lock and connects with a Stalling Prussian Suplex. Lowe lands hard on the back of his head. Dead looks at the corner and gets a crazed look. He ascends to the top as the fans come alive. Dead jumps off, looking for a double foot stomp, but…
Trey: Raging Dead over shot and landed on the other side of Frank Lowe. How odd…
Raging Dead lets out a roar, drops down and bites the open wound on Frank Lowe's shoulder!
Case: It looks like that over shoot was intentional, Trey.
Raging Dead releases the hold after half a dozen seconds and gets to his feet, blood dripping down his chin. Frank Lowe rolls around on the mat, grasping his injured shoulder. Dead pulls Lowe up and points at the cage. The fans go wild as Dead sends Lowe crashing head first into the cage wall, his blood splattering the fans in the front row. Dead pulls Lowe back up, and tosses him over the top rope. Lowe staggers to his feet, standing between the ropes and the cage wall. Dead charges at Lowe and connects with a splash, and then another splash, and then another… you guessed it… splash. After the third one, Lowe crumbles to the apron.
Trey: Now would probably be a good time for Raging Dead to try winning the match.
Case: He doesn't seem too interested in winning right now, Trey.
Dead pulls Lowe up and walks him to the corner. He starts to climb the ropes, as he pulls Lowe up with him. With both men now standing on the top rope, Dead seemingly gets distracted by the roaring fans here in Columbus, Ohio. This is just enough time for Lowe to slam Dead's head on the top of the cage several times. Dead's foot slips and he crashes upside down in the corner, accidentally hooking himself in a tree of woe.
Trey: And just like that, the tides have turned for Pure Champion Frank Lowe.
Frank jumps down to the mat and punches Dead in the netherregion. He then staggers to the other side of the ring, still holding onto his injured shoulder. He yells out…
Frank Lowe: Hang 'Em… Out… to Dry!
Lowe runs toward Dead and shoots in for a baseball slide… but Dead pulls himself up… and Lowe's feet crash into the corner of the steel cage. Dead pulls up enough to unhook himself and turns around, sitting on the top rope. Lowe pulls himself out of the corner and uses the ropes to stand up.
Case: Frank Lowe seems to be favoring his left ankle.
When Lowe turns around, Dead comes flying out of the corner and connects with a one knee codebreaker…
Case: DEAD!
He covers Lowe and hooks both legs…
1…
2…
3!
The bell rings and "Rage 25/8" by Z Mann Zilla starts to play. Raging Dead rolls off of Frank Lowe and slowly gets to his feet. He is handed the Pure Championship and looks down at it, dripping blood on the main plate. He holds it over his head and the fans cheer.
Trey: We've got a new Trinity Wrestling Pure Champion… and he is the Raging Dead!
Case: He told everyone from day one he came here for that title, and his prophecy has been fulfilled.
Trey: What's next for our new champion? Tune in next week when… wait a second…
A group of people walk out from backstage as the music dies down.
Case: Oh wow. Kitty Petrova, Damian Simmons, Samuel Flowers, Mute, and Scott Sinclair… also new hires Tammy T and Mr. Giggles!
Trey: The entire Pure Division is here… but why?
The group of wrestlers start walking down the ramp as Raging Dead lies the Pure Championship on the mat in front of him, challenging them all to come and get it… as the show goes off the air...