Post by Jessie Lee on Dec 26, 2021 23:44:18 GMT -5
"RE! VO! LU! TION! ONE!"
"You all know what I'mma 'bout to ask, but I'mma do it anyway......"
"........"
"Are ya ready?"
"Revolutionist!"
"Wrestling fans the world over!"
"Hell, even our very own Death Row inmates!"
"ARE?"
"YOU?"
"READY?"
"Are ya motley crew of bloodthirsty entertainment connoisseurs ready for the show stealin' performance that has been promised to y'all from the moment that those keen-eyed management types over at SPLAT! announced this holiday hustle? Are ya anticipatin' the unbound and hellish war that myself an' the legendary Miss Kitty Dark are 'bout to wage for that right to championship domain over the entire fuckin' multiverse that is professional wrestlin' an' beyond? Are ya ready, huh? Are ya?"
"Cause I'm MORE than fuckin' ready for this."
"See, this might be lost on some of ya but this is EXACTLY the sort of opportunity I've been lookin' for. Right here, in Toronto Canada, I have the chance to show the entire fuckin' multiverse that Revo One ain't the place to look down on; that we ain't just another retread of every other angsty half-assed wrestlin' promotion that's claimed to bring about revolutions have been. I get to prove to everyone that the little company that's takin' a chance on us; to prove that Revo One has more than just potential to be one of the best companies around, but that it IS. Yeah, I'm fully aware that there are plenty of narrow-minded drongos out there in the industry that are thinkin' precisely what it is that I'm aimin' to prove them wrong about an' that there are those on Revo One's roster that are hopin' that I end up bitin' the big loss. They're out there lickin' their chops in hopes they'll be able to get their pound of flesh from the back of the Horrorcore Hottie; like mindless hyenas, they cackle an' wait."
"So fuckin' what?"
"Whether ya like it or not; an' yes I'm talkin' directly to YOU people; there isn't a damn thing ya can do to make that a reality. Sure, ya can wait an' hope that Kitty Dork tears me apart in the scaffold match. In fact, ya could even be like good ol' Xtremely Yawn-inducing Zilcho an' pounce on me durin' the barbaric bout that's going to happen in a few days. However, deep within the pit of your rotten guts ya already know just how fuckin' idiotic that is. Y'all already know that Jessie Lee ain't the girl to lie back so that the pathetic ass world can have its way. Hell Nah! She's a fighter. She's a warrior unparalleled. She'd sooner die than lie back an' die."
"So here's your reminder not to FUCK with the baddest bish in Revolution One!"
"Now, there are those that don't know what it is I'm talkin' 'bout an' that's perfectly fine. They can hide behind their false faces of respect an' adoration for the Kitten Dork all they like; hell, they can place all their bets on the nearly twenty-year veteran of the sport if they want. However, it isn't goin' to change the fact that there will be a NEW Multiversal Champ walkin' outta the Scotiabank arena Tuesday Night. It isn't goin' to change the reality that the legendary near the four-month reign of quote-unquote "Killer" Kitty Dark."
"........."
"Hold up......"
""KILLER" Kitty?"
"Are ya fuckin' serious? That's cringy as all hell an' lacks all sorts of creativity that promotors expect from the folks they hire; even minimally!"
"Though, that kinda explains how Kitty managed to maintain the long game of longevity in this normally career shortenin' career. She started out as the Gothic Goddess or Kitty Mac or whatever severely painful muscle spasms that level of cringe will bring about; an' that's comin' from someone that's fully aware of how she dresses. That said, I ain't one to dismiss the fact that the woman I'm steppin' into that ring against has nearly two decades of in-ring experience an' knows full well how to handle herself once that bell rings. In fact, the ol' Sinnly Queen built up the early part of her career much like I've been doin'; just with more early two thousands angsty cringe. The ironclad sheila lied, cheated, fought, an' clawed her way to where she is now; horse rehabilitator extraordinaire, actress, an' soon-to-be-former Multiversal Champion."
"Wow, talk about growin' out of a phase."
"Jokes an' potshots aside. I just hope her Twitter silence has been because she was focused more on trainin' for this match than gettin' that ol' veteran bug up her ass 'bout how I ain't worth her time; that her nearly two decades of bein' on the scene mean more than that she was just the fuckin' horse-faced punchin' bag of every company she drifted through. Like, I know I ain't like that Greek bish Atara Themis an' I don't sport a flaky fuckin' record of skippin' out of companies after a few matches or a habit of talkin' the cheap primary school shit talk that so many of the so-called "Famous" faces are fond of durin' their verbal masturbation sessions, but I am a sheila that has more drive to be the fuckin' best than any of those over self-indulgent cucks have every fuckin' been. In fact, Kitten, I'd wager that I have more desire and determination to BE the Multiversal Champion than you've ever had."
"Shocking, I know, but ya don't have your heart in it."
"While you're takin' a month off from gettin' your ass whooped by the sheila with a bird fetish, I've been the one remindin' that this match is happenin' at Christmas Chaos. Hell, even compared to how ya normally promote your defenses I was puttin' in more effort to remind the people that the Multiversal Championship was even a thing. Yeah, you post some pretty inspirational things an' train real fuckin' hard to live up that persona you've been buildin' since ya settled the fuck down an' took some medication to help with the grade-A angsty personality creatin' chemical imbalances that would make any pre-teen lookin' to be edgy happy. Ya don't even understand the potential that strap has, do ya? Naaaah. To you, the Multiversal Championship is just one more accolade to add to your long and increasingly generic career; face it, darlin', ya only reached this pseudo legend status cause of your inability to REALLY make it big. Call me a lyin' hack job all ya want, but it doesn't change the reality that people only remember your existence DUE to the Multiversal strap. Without it, you're just one more faceless journeywoman of this sport whose meaningless existence on ninety-nine percent of wrestling shows 'round the fuckin' world can be replaced at the drop of a pin in favor of bad bishes far fuckin' hungrier for the chance to prove themselves."
"Bishes like ME."
"The Multiversal Championship, the strap that I'mma fuckin' sully after I beat ya senseless, is the one championship floatin' 'round that means far more than any companies' world strap. Big claim, I know, but it's the damn truth; a truth nobody seems willin' to acknowledge. See, the straps that all these prop up as "world" championship ain't nothing more than the biggest an' shiniest belts they got; there isn't any ACTUAL defenses takin' place around the world unless it's kept nice in cozy in the arms of whatever local promotion owns it. The Multiversal strap though? THAT strap's entire identity is to go travelin' 'round the world to be defended at any place brave enough to possibly have their so-called top dogs upstaged an' disgraced."
"The Multiversal Championship is LITERALLY the championship of the world."
"It means, that beyond a shadow of a doubt, that YOU are the fuckin' best regardless of what wrestlin' company you're battin' for. It means that anyone, whether it's an old grizzled vet or a brand new unknown face, has an opportunity to prove to the world what they themselves already know; that they're the best. Which is why I jumped at this match the way I have. I WANT the entire fuckin' WORLD to know that I am the BEST; not just in Revolution One, but the entire fucking WORLD. Yeah, I'm fully in the know that it takes more than pretty words to be a champion an' I know full fuckin' well that I'm goin' to have to make my way through some serious fuckin' pain to get to where I wanna be. I know that, despite all my jokes an' shots, that Kitty Dark is one of the baddest bishes in the world an' has the prolonged history of bloodshed to prove it. However, ya gotta understand somethin'."
"I LIVE for that shit."
"It doesn't matter how much pain I have to go through; it doesn't matter WHO I have to go through; I will NEVER stop fightin'! I will NEVER back down from a fuckin' challenge. An' I sure as shit will NEVER relent; whether if it's who I am as a person or what I do in that ring, I'mma give every single person the very fuckin' best I have to give. Whether it's a standard one on one matches or the craziest motherfuckin' wars that any person can come up with, I step up to that plate an' I full-on go in with everything that I am. All the bloody determination, desire, an' indomitable willpower goes into every grapple; every punch. Kitty, I'mma be fightin' you with more fire an' desire than you've seen in a LONG fuckin' time. So don't take it personally when I shatter your fuckin' jaw an' drop ya on your skull with the sickest LEEthatlity I can fuckin' muster; cause your painfully sad half-assed excuse of a championship is comin' to an end REAL fuckin' quick."
"So Kitty Dark, soon to be EX Multiversal Champion, there's only one last thing to say."
"Let's."
"Fuckin'."
"GO."
